Bernd and I have a very special memory to a part of last summers vacation: our canoe trip on the Shenandoah River near Skyline Drive in the western part of Virginia. Bernd has always dreamed of taking such a trip in a natural rural setting in the U.S. Our friends, the H and V families, had, as they do every year, arranged a "river cruise" for the youth group of my former church. Since we were there at the appropriate time, we were invited to go along. That was an invitation we did not have to think twice about accepting, an opportunity to have a dream come true. We drove up to the Blue Ridge Mountains on Friday night and stayed at Larry V's barn, better known to the initiated as the "Naked Acres".

Up early on a bright morning - with half opened eyes - off we went to the river outfitters. For us first timers it seemed chaotic there. People going in twenty different directions at once. In the process of all the confusion, everyone had to get a life jacket and a paddle – a back rest and river shoes were optional. John V lent me a waist pack to keep all the valuable possessions that were not to be left in the car. Important tip, keep all your important things well secured on your person. At one point at the little store I noticed a guy frantically looking through all the boxes of rock shoes, to find a pair that would fit him. That made me look at what kind of shoes everyone was wearing. I noticed something very significant: everyone was wearing sandals with ankle straps except me. I wore slip-on Birkenstock sandals with no ankle straps. Everyone in our church group piled into an old school bus. For Bernd, a first, since he never had the pleasure most of us experienced growing up: riding in a school bus and being bounced along on back country roads. The radio played a song I really enjoyed, Arlo Guthries Alice's Restaurant. I always liked the song but did not know how appropriate it was until the end of our canoe adventure.

Let me repeat that neither Bernd nor I have ever been in a canoe before. To introduce the greenhorns to the safety precautions for such a trip, the organizers showed a movie how to negotiate the wild river safely. Being caught up in the confusion and melee of people still looking for a fitting life vest, we of course managed to miss the movie. This proved to be a crucial mistake. We got a very pretty red canoe. Bernd got in the back, since the back paddler is supposed to do the strongest paddling and get us out of the desperate situations in a hurry. I got in the front and was supposed to steer the boat and set it in the right direction. In plain words, keep us off the hidden rocks that lurk just below the surface, waiting to reach out and grab you as you flow over them.

We placed a plastic bag with a couple of water bottles, sun screen, something to nibble on, etc., on the floor of our canoe. We achieved our first task successfully, as we both got into the canoe without sinking it and started paddling down the river. At first I was extremely timid, having to be the guide and having no knowledge or feel for what I was doing. As time went on my confidence grew and I began to think I was developing a feel for the river. I began to imagine I might be a French trapper paddling around the lakes and streams in Canada, except it was much warmer on the Shenandoah. We were doing quite well maneuvering through the rocks, particularly considering it was our first time. In fact, we appeared to be so skilled to another couple that they commented on our unique and ingenious ways of passing through the rocks. They thought we were so good they were following us and using our techniques – and these people had canoed before!

After three hours of paddling we had worked up quite an appetite. We appreciated our nice stop at the side of the river for lunch. Plenty of food was provided by the canoe outfitters. After our break everyone went and got back into their canoes. Did our success of the morning mean that we possessed a real talent for canoeing, or just beginner's luck?

I climbed into our canoe and was all settled, Bernd pushed off and started climbing into the boat. Suddenly the world was upside down and quite wet. All our stuff, which was not tied down, started to float away. We managed to collect all of it and get it back into our canoe. After our refreshing dip we also climbed in again and started on our way down the river – maybe we should have watched the movie.

We were enjoying the tree lined banks of the river and the occasional cow coming down to the river bank to cool off with a refreshing drink of water. About half a hour out, still enjoying this ideal, disaster struck. Those invisible, deceiving, treacherous rocks reached out from below with their tentacles and grabbed us with all of their viciousness. With all of Bernd's furious efforts to paddle us free, the engulfing rocks were pulling us more and more into their velcro grip. They refused to let us go, until they had forced us to turn sideways in the river. That is an absolute no-no in canoeing, because when that happens, over you go with no mercy. Bath time whether you want to or not.

This time the water was deeper than by the shore and there were lots of very slippery rocks underfoot. One of my sandals wanted desperately to go floating down the river without the rest of me. Trying with one hand to hold on to my paddle, which you are not supposed to let go at all cost, the other hand was clinging to the canoe. While my upper body was trying to prevent itself from being drawn in different directions, the lower body was very busy with its own contortionist activities. I was desperately trying to maintain balance while I was standing on one foot on very slippery rocks. (Thank goodness for Tai Chi). At some point the paddle went paddling by itself; I did manage to keep possession of my sandal. The canoe was obviously distressed at being upside down; it turned against me and savagely beat into my thigh. It seemed like ages passed, as we slowly gathered some semblance of composure. I realized one thing: all the wrangling trying to save my shoe used up my energy and strength. I really did not know how I was going to help turn over the canoe in the state I was in.

Then two very nice young "Grecian Gods" came over to help us. Along the way they collected some of our stuff; I managed to gather a few things also. They very nicely turned over our canoe for us and helped us get safely back in. One thing I will say: the weather was so lovely, the dip was refreshing if exhausting. Later we learned the movie showed how to avoid rocks and the importance of proper rock shoes.

As we went paddling down the river again we came upon John and Todd V in their canoe. They had managed to catch the rest of our missing stuff except for one of Bernd's socks. I think that was pretty good for such an adventure, to lose only one sock. Shortly before the end of our trip there was a small rapid that we were supposed to go over. I had had enough of adventure, so Bernd put me and all of our loose stuff ashore just before the rapid and went on alone. That morning before we took off in the canoes, we had been instructed what to do when you go through the rapid alone: get on your knees in the middle of the canoe and paddle from that position as you go through the rapid. This now being later in the afternoon on an adventurous day, we both forgot everything and anything we had ever heard – empty brain. By the time I got around the huge boulder and back to the shore, Bernd was already there, and so was the canoe and the paddle. Bernd had had his next adventure. Since he was sitting alone in the back of the canoe, he could not control the boat. About half way down the rapids the problems started: it was dunking time again. Canoe upside down, paddle lost. If that was not enough, Bernd's insecure "life vest", instead of saving his life, turned vicious, trying to force his head underwater. He had a frantic fight with his "life vest". I am happy I did not see that; I would have had a fit and a half, to put it mildly.

At this point we were able to take a rest. The young people had fun climbing up a rock cliff and jumping into the water. We had fun just watching. After the break, we paddled on to the collecting point for our trip. The canoes were taken out of the water and carried up a steep hill. We all got back into the school bus and were transported back to the outfitters. There we had a very nice grilled steak dinner while a couple of guys played country music. What could be more appropriate than that? In the middle of nowhere in the Appalachians listening to country music. That is the home of country and blue grass. While being enthralled by the music, I got fascinated watching the young people working there, filling a pick-up truck with bags and bags of garbage, and driving off with it. They kept coming back refilling the truck. It reminded me so much of the story of Alice's Restaurant, with all mounds of garbage to be disposed of. The whole setting was an appropriate and great way to wind up an exciting adventure.

A really weird aftermath of this adventure is, even though I felt like I was going to have a humdinger of a bruise from where the canoe attacked my leg, it never developed. But now I do have a dent in my leg, at the very place the canoe attacked it. Do not ask me to explain that one.

Would we want to go on a canoe trip again? Marianne: YEAH, in a minute; and Bernd's response: YIP!